Special Valentines

Our fourth-grade classroom buzzed with excitement. The day of our Valentine’s party had arrived. Each desk was equipped with a box or a bag to receive cards from other students. We darted around the room passing out Valentine’s cards before class started. 

Some students tried to secretly deliver gifts to the boy or girl for whom they had feelings. The romances of my fourth-grade friends seldom lasted more than a few days. One boy, in an attempt to win the affections of a girl, delivered a cardboard heart filled with chocolates. His efforts to be secretive failed when the girl’s card receptacle tore and crashed to the floor.

 Most of our parents had purchased identical boxes of Valentine’s Day cards at the same store for this party. Many of the cards I gave were exactly like the cards I received. Still, I wanted the perfect card for each person. I thought about how much I liked or disliked the person I intended to give the card too. I considered whether the card was going to a boy or a girl. I worried about what meaning the recipient may, or may not, read into the message of the card. Assigning cards to my classmates was a difficult task. 

I usually gave friends a card that said something like, “Glad you are my friend, Valentine.” A person whose affections I wanted might receive, “Will you be my Valentine?” Anyone who was not a friend would receive a card that simply said, “Happy Valentine’s Day.” Today I shake my head at how much time I spent deciding which Valentine’s Day card to give to each person.

If I spent as much time pursuing the heart of God now, as I did sorting Valentine’s day cards in fourth grade, what would happen? How much better would my life radiate His love for those around me? My walk with Him would certainly be closer. What effect would that closer walk have on every one of my relationships? Would I be more of an inspiration for my family, coworkers, neighbors, and anyone else I come into contact with? How much better of a husband would I be for my wife?

Did you know that God pursues us? He wants a relationship with each one of us. The story of scripture is the story of God working out a plan for the redemption of fallen humans. The Bible is filled with stories of God desiring to have a relationship with the humans he created. This pursuit is even more amazing when you consider He opened the way for us to be reconciled to Him through the sacrificial death of His Son.

The development of a healthy, romantic relationship requires each person to pursue the other. I had a friend who was enamored with a young lady who attended the same college as he did. All her friends stated that she had expressed a romantic interest in my friend. He would ask her for a date and she would turn him down over and over. He refused to give up on her. Finally, she agreed to go on a date. One date turned into many dates. Those of us watching recognized she was not reciprocating his pursuit. She worried. What if he proved untrustworthy? What if he ever found out the things about her that only she knew? Eventually, she seemed to soften a little. She began to show that she cared about him. He proposed marriage. She hesitated and then said no. He continued to date her. She began to understand that the relationship could only grow if she also invested in it. He proposed again and she agreed. They have been happily married for many years now.

Unfortunately, this story is often a picture of what happens when God pursues us. We do not believe that He cares. His promises seem to be too good to be true. We see how unworthy we are. We appreciate the gesture, but not enough to pursue Him in return. Fulfillment and spiritual growth come in the recognition and reciprocation of the pursuit.

God wants us to pursue Him. The pursuit of God is not all that different from when one pursues the affection of another person. When I was dating, I tried to avoid doing things that my girlfriend found offensive. I tried to act like I had good manners. I even opened her car door for her. I allowed her to change me. I was hoping I would be the person she would choose to pursue. What would happen if I allowed God to make changes in my life the way I allowed my girlfriend to make changes in me?

I recall learning patience and consideration on some of our dates. Taking her to a fast-food restaurant was challenging for me. I am the type of person that orders quickly and usually orders the same thing every time. My girlfriend was a missionary kid who had grown up in Peru, South America.  Consequently, she was unfamiliar with the items on the menu in even the most famous fast-food restaurants. She would stand there and read through the menu while the line behind us grew. She would ask questions, while the line continued to grow. Then, with hesitation, she would try to make a choice. I would bite my tongue as the growing line grumbled behind us.  Finally, the order would be placed, and I would pay and breathe a sigh of relief.  To show the patience and consideration for her that was needed, I had to understand why she was slow ordering. I had to care more about her than about my embarrassment.

As I look at my life, I marvel at the patience and consideration God has shown me. God always knows when I do not understand, am hesitant, or am confused. He has shown great patience while trying to teach me, even when I have to repeat the lesson. God always considers my ability to understand what I experience. He is never mystified about the intent of my thoughts and actions. His goal is to draw everyone into His shadow and show us all how much He loves us.